4 Ways To Demonstrate Value Through Cooking

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Over the years, I’ve had a few students who were great cooks – even some professional chefs. This week I ran into one and he asked, “How can I use my cooking skills for dates?”

Here’s how:

1. Don’t talk about cooking for them ahead of time. Make it a surprise. Invite your date over, and when they arrive, already be cooking whatever it is you were planning on making. That means not outright saying, “I want to cook you dinner,” ahead of time – even if you’re a professional. It’s sometimes more fun to find out a person you’re interested in has an awesome skill set. Don’t waste the opportunity.

2. Ask if they want some. Don’t let that person assume you made it for the two of you. It should feel spontaneous, not contrived.

3. Root the meal. Tell them a story about why you like to cook this meal. Something about where you learned it, who taught it to you, or what this meal means to you. Do not make this story technical – make it emotional.

“I love the smell of fettuccine because my grandmother used to make it for me, and whenever I smell it I feel good,” is better than, “It’s made with handmade noodles and organic cheeses.” One story tells your date something about you, the other tells your date something about the food. Your goal is to share something about your identity with them.

4. Unless it’s on, take your date out afterward. Think of cooking for your date as just another DHV – like a bar-con or an identity story. Don’t assume that just because you cook her a good meal you don’t need to do anything else to build value. (People who are good at dancing should heed this advice as well.)

Feel free to comment with any other ideas that were used effectively in this area!

10 Comments on “4 Ways To Demonstrate Value Through Cooking”

  1. thanx man…dat was some eye opener ryt thea!!!so how does this apply thoze who are good at dancin

    ze don

    1. This goes for all sources of value – learn to be flexible and make sure you’re value comes in from several different places. Guys who tend to be particularly good at something like to put all their eggs in one basket. A guy who’s good at only dancing will not do as well as a guy who can dance, cook, perform bar-cons and tell great stories.

  2. I can only really cook Chinese. Girls dig being fed. Almost to the point of servitude. It can get quite funny seeing them do stuff knowing they want feeding. Not sex stuff. Just stuff. Now if only I could find a women who can cook for the times I can’t be arsed. Learnt mine from books. It’s not as hard as you think. Started with ken hom and went from there. Like many things in life the secret if there is one to Chinese cooking is preparation.

    1. number 2 – have some food storage boxes out. Make it seem like or even say your cooking a bit extra to store in the fridge or freezer to save you cooking again later. Theres your excuse to why theres enough food for four. Dont just offfer her, let her smell it cooking and with chinese the noise is wicked, like a routine on its own.

  3. They say the way for a woman to get a man is thru giving him great sex and great food… yet most of the greatest chefs are men… ironic.

    I enjoy cooking myself and have become quite good at it over the years – the fact that it can be a seduction method for women is another plus – to which I have had the pleasure of experiencing firsthand.

    It’s disappointing, more women than not that I’ve been with are terrible cooks or can’t cook at all. Men and women alike appreciate someone who knows how to make a tasty meal – making it an equal opportunity DMV.

  4. Hmm think it over-analysis’s the whole thing…

    I asked a girl to come over so I could cook a meal for us both (ok a little AFC but this was a while ago)

    However, it worked, she loved it and we ended up in my bedroom! That was a 2nd date

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